The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 8: Will the Government Help Me?)

Hahahahahaha! …ahhh… man, I needed that. Oh wait, you were serious? No. No, of course the government will not help you! They will be too busy helping themselves.

They probably saw this apocalypse, whatever it was, coming a mile away. Hell, they probably planned it. And they have taken measures just beforehand to somehow turn a huge profit for themselves out of the chaos. They always do that. If you ask them for help, you will only get a recorded message or a useless website referral filled with mind-numbing babble-speech that will leave you ready to embrace any apocalypse they want to throw at you. If you get angry, don’t worry – they are not only well-prepared to reap huge profits off of your misery, but they are also prepared to shut you up but good. They have armed your local police with military weapons, military vehicles, and a military mentality. The military is your police now and they don’t work for you. You are an enemy combatant. “But whatever happened to Posse Comitatus?” you ask. Forget it. It’s not there anymore. Neither is your right to protest nor your right to go unmolested should you start asking questions. So shut up about it already. I don’t know you. Walk away. In fact, this part of the book doesn’t even exist.


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