About pookabazooka

I am an ape living abroad, writing to stay focused and to remember the things I think about. I post them here in case you'd like to spend a bit of time thinking about them, too.

Watch For Quantum Tantrums™

In the year 1233, a woman by the name of Adelaide Brandt du Falke became so enraged in a heated argument with her sister that she was heard to declare, “Fuck you, ya NPC cunt! Your entire reality exists solely on a thumb drive! You’re not even connected to the internet, bitch! I could crush your whole world and you’d have nowhere to go!”

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Two Rabbits (Why I never married)


I had an interesting conversation. It started out mundane, as most interesting conversations do. I mean, you can’t just jump right to the interesting stuff, you’ve got to go through the introductions before you get to the foreplay that leads to a ripping good conversation. For the purpose of this post, and as a courtesy to your time, I will cut right to the sex. That is, the interesting bits of the conversation.

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An Open Letter to Mitch McConnell

On this blog, I like to poke fun at Mr. Mitch McConnell, Republican representative from the bizarro state of Kentucky. Tonight, however, I want to write a letter to Mr. McConnell to let him know that his life is no joke. It’s not funny. And when his body dies, he will learn just how horrible his life has been.

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The Spaces Between: Another Excerpt

Another excerpt from The Spaces Between, an opus like no other… because I haven’t written any others. Don’t think of it as a literary work, think of it more as a hobby of mine that I am inflicting upon you. When we last left Ted, he was at the infamous Nellis Air Force Base, AKA “Area 51.” And… he’s still there, but getting more involved.

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